#I hadn't seen a lot of this stuff mentioned anywhere and I think it just needs to be said

[eeper-jeeper]

Ok so I finally got the chance to listen through Our Martyred Lady with a friend and I just want to talk about a few things especially regarding Celefax because I heard of a few things before going into it like the focus scene and the robes but there is some more to chew on that I want to discuss so bad

So MAJOR spoilers below!! (Also heads up I am still very new to Warhammer in general and have forgotten some terms)

Ok so for starters I want to just talk about the fact Greyfax knows what bees are enough to question why someone else doesn't know what they are. I just think this is just a fun bit and something about it is just very humorous to me. Like how much random knowledge does she know about old life forms? Either way I love the fact the knowledge of bees has persisted this far.

Next, characters constantly bring up that Greyfax spending time with Celestine is changing her. It happens like twice and it is so funny especially given she says something like "What do you know of me?" In reply like everyone sees that crush a mile away girl !!

The fact Greyfax got angry that she wasn't informed that Celestine was on Terra for two whole days before she knew!! In tandem with this Celestine personally requesting Greyfax to see her like !!! Hello?? These facts are so everything to me like they wanted to see each other??

The ecclesiarchy guy describes how pretty Celestine is in detail and this distracts Greyfax enough for her to snap at him to be quiet. (To be fair they were up high so she could get away from all the mind clutter of the crowd) BUT I think it's fun that this is the note this conversation ends on.

When shit hits the fan and the assassination attempt starts and Greyfax reaches out to Celestines mind to reassure her that it's her doing the shooting currently because of said attempt. Then Celestine says Katarinya… and automatically trusts that it's her and goes along with said plan. THEN !!! WHEN Celestine mentions there's an Inquisitor here she knows and trusts the music starts sparkling?? IT'S WRITING ITSELF I CAN'T MAKE THIS SHIT UP !!!

Greyfaxs assistant was sososo funny so he gets a mention here.

When Greyfax points out that it's odd that the Emperor would bring Celestine to protect just one guy and Celestine laughs in response. I really enjoyed their banter in this audio drama as it didn't feel like it was with malice. It was very much reasonable for Greyfax to point out but also I do enjoy the fact that Celestine comes back with equal energy. It's a fun dynamic and it feels like they both keep each other on their toes. 

Celestine correctly calls out Greyfax about leaving her assistant with the guy they were protecting but in the most endearing tone of voice possible. 

This part, oh my goodness, THIS PART. When Greyfax and Celestine get into another one of their spats. Celestine tells Greyfax to have faith which she responds with to who? The emperor or humanity? WHICH CELESTINE GOES IN ME for starters. Like my jaw was on the floor, what in the yuri?? Faith in her?? She wants Greyfax to find faith. in. HER. Like I need a minute holy moly that's yea… yea… AND I WILL GET BACK TO THIS LATER.

Celestine basically becoming an Astronomicon for the most sopping wet cat Navigator I must add. Greyfax was against it but when she sees her shining brightly outside the ship she goes “Just as I saw her on Cadia…” it's really a shame I didn't write down the whole line because it was a lot gayer than that. In my notes I just have “A SHINING VEIL” written in all caps and I know Greyfax described Celestine as that but much more elegantly. I cannot make this shit up. I cannot.

This next bit had me cackling and I would love to explore their dynamic more in scenes like this but when Celestine is rushing into battle and Greyfax comes on the vox and says “One or two alive would be nice.” and Celestine laughs and says she'll try. This is followed up by Celestine basically scruffing the two enemies who gave her sass while saying “I know an Inquisitor who would like to talk to you!” Like she's… such a dork… I love her so much the image has not left my head. “You will suffer the wrath of Inquisitor Greyfax!” LIKE I LOVE HER DHDKSNKSND 

ALSO here feels like a good place to mention Celestine only calls Greyfax by Katarinya to her face and I think that's sweet personally. 

The robes scene we all know about and it's absolutely insane that it happened. I cannot believe its canon. What were those doing there Greyfax??? CAN'T MAKE THIS SHIT UP 

THE INTERROGATION SCENE !! Can we just talk about what a power duo Celefax is because wow they worked so well together here!! Personally I'm still laughing about the prisoner shouting to get that witch away from her and Greyfax basically going Oh Celestine? She stays ^_^ and Celestine immediately bouncing off her to go: It must be the emperor's holy light piercing your soul >:) Like they are the power couple ever fr

Greyfax yelling at the Black Templars then doing a complete 180 with her tone to be like Celestine can you help us perhaps? 

Greyfax basically breaking into Celestine's room after she doesn't answer her vox. Immediately Greyfax can tell something is wrong too by the look on Celestine's face and I just.. I cannot make this shit u

I will be real, I might have misinterpreted this scene as I don't really remember the details but Celestine becomes a beacon again and Greyfax while not having any personal faith to give still does everything in her power to protect Celestine. Like Greyfax personally beefs with a daemon so Celestine can focus I'm pretty sure at this bit. That's how it came off to me at least and at the end of it Greyfax admits that perhaps Celestine is really blessed. 

Greyfax arguing with the Black Templar Marshall and Celestine goes “Katarinya, is now really the time for this?” Ever so calmly that Greyfax IMMEDIATELY is like no and backs off. I don't even know what to say at this point like she got her to calm down THAT QUICKLY.

One bit of the focus scene I feel like we haven't focused on enough (pun intended). Is the fact before the device breaks when Greyfax goes into it she specifically thinks of Celestine to stay calm. I HAVE NEVER MET A GAYER WOMAN (and I am one!!) 

This being followed up by Celestine literally breaking into Greyfaxs room to make sure she's ok. “Wake up Katarinya it's me!” I adore busting each other's doors down is a recurring thing between them. However for the doors sake I might have a suggestion for both of them that'll get me shot on sight! 

The focus scene could literally have its own post genuinely because WOW. Celestine going “Trust me, Katarinya.” “Show a little faith.” Like Greyfax is putty in her hands practically and you can't tell me otherwise. THE KNEELING TOGETHER?? GREYFAX APOLOGIZING IN THE MOST VULNERABLE TONE WE'VE HEARD FROM HER?? Can't make it up just losing my freaking mind!!! It being said specifically we are the gauntlet and the fist. Ya know, we… like both of them… I'm so normal. There is no heterosexual explanation for anything that goes on in this scene. “I believe you, I believe in you Katarinya!”

Next time they rush into battle Celestine jokes “No prisoners this time, Katarinya?” I love her, your honor.

So for the climax now when Celestine gets taken prisoner and her wings start turning black has about equally as much to discuss. So first Greyfax immediately calls out to Celestine and encourages her to fight through it. “By Throne I won't let this happen!” She says literally!! They took her gf dammit!! Celestine asks Greyfax to keep her safe. Greyfax literally saying “I won't let you take her!” Like without just quoting a bunch of stuff from this part I like how this was like a culmination of their progress together. Genuinely this scene was awesome and to see Greyfax fight so hard out of genuine care for Celestine was EVERYTHING !! As well as we see how much trust Celestine puts into Greyfax at this moment. And the kicker of it all is when they inevitably have to kill Celestine, its Greyfax who yells at Longinus to have faith. LIKE she did it, she said it, she has faith in Celestine. I love this moment so much it's crazy. 

Longinus not knowing that Celestine revives is genuinely one of the funniest bits in the drama because Greyfax is so incredibly smug about it. “I'm surprised by this gap in your knowledge.” Like the way she says it??? Yea she knows all things Celestine and she's gonna rub it in your face apparently !! I need more of this desperately PLEASE.

Greyfax asking Celestine what she's going to do to the heretic for Celestine to basically be like you know exactly what I'm going to do. (And that she does! The ending genuinely could have not been any funnier)

So in conclusion to my ramble:

[suckerforcate]

Hi!! I wanted to request something for Brienne. I was gonna try and write it since a friend and I have been talking about it, but I’m simply not as good as you 🥹

Basically a love triangle with reader, Brienne, and Jaime. Reader has feelings for Brienne but everyone has been pointing out how Jaime and Brienne would be a good couple so reader just distances themselves and Brienne notices, thinking that reader is done putting up with her and doesn’t really like her so she confronts them and leads to reader confessing and stuff. And Brienne confesses too.

Thanks!

You, not him

Pairing: Brienne of Tarth x Reader

Word Count: 1617

Warning: Angst, mention of vomiting,

A/n: I didn't want to make Reader too old, as I thought it would be quite unrealistic for her to still be unmarried then. Hence the age gap. Hope that is okay. I thought of Reader as beginning to mid twenty, as Brienne is about end of thiry. I really hope you like what I did with your request!! I really liked writing it.

When Brienne had come back, you had been so happy. You hadn't seen her for such a long time, and you really wanted to tell her everything that had happened. But when she had arrived she hadn't been alone. Jamie Lannister sat on a horse just behind her. You didn't like him, he always had this arrogant, smug look. Like he was better than all the rest. So your initial thought was that Brienne held him captive, but he walked around freely and Brienne held actual conversations with him.

It had been about two weeks since they had arrived, and you were fed up with the Kingslayer. It was enough. Honestly, since they arrived you couldn't talk to Brienne without him following her like a stray puppy. And even though he seemed to like her, way too much to your liking, he still made cruel jokes about her. Couldn't he decide if he liked her or not?!

At the beginning, you thought as long as it's one-sided it doesn't matter. But after a few more weeks you couldn't go anywhere without hearing people talk about the two of them.

"They make such a nice pair, don't they?"

"Oh yes, have you seen the way they look at each other?"

Others weren't so polite about it.

"Honestly, I think she just wants to fuck him. And he wouldn't be averse either, I think." They laughed dirty and left. You just stood there, tears in your eyes.

In the past week you hadn't talked so much with Brienne, because you had to help your mother a lot. You guessed that week was enough for their relationship to take a new turn.

Actually you had looked forward to this evening as Brienne wanted to teach you some sword-fighting. You thought you could finally spend some time together. Alone. Like you always used to. But considering the newest information, you really didn't feel like going.

Sitting on you bed that evening, all you could do was cry. You had always feared that she would come back one day. In love. With a partner. But the cruel reality of it hit you stronger than anticipated.

You felt so empty and yet so full of emotions. Full of sadness and rage.

Dinner hadn't been the best idea. You realised that as you felt it coming up again. Cowering over the toilet, still crying, you felt as pathetic as probably possible.

Why were you like this? All your friends always told you about how they fell in love with a cute, rich, honourable prince. How they had their happy life. The life that was promised to all of you, from childhood on.

But you? Of course, you had to be different. Falling in love with a woman about fifteen years older than you, way out of your reach and in love with someone else. Stupid you.

----------------

The next days to weeks you avoided Brienne. It hurt way too much and every time you saw her together with Jamie you felt tears prick in your eyes. In addition to that you thought if you avoided her maybe it would be easier for you to forget about her. You wanted to be happy for her so bad. But you just couldn't. Whatever you did, you cried yourself to sleep. Either because you missed her, because you had seen her with Jamie or because you had heard people talk about them again. Even your own mother talked about them, that definitely didn't make it easier at all.

-----------------

You knew the avoiding part wouldn't work forever and sooner or later you needed to talk to her. But that day came sooner rather than later. And you definitely weren't prepared for it, you were far too in love with her.

For the first time in weeks you dared to go out, into the garden. The garden had always been the place where you and Brienne could talk for hours. So you should have known that you would meet her there.

You were reading a book when you felt someone standing next to you. You looked up, right into Brienne's eyes. Your body visible tensed and you directly looked away. Still Brienne sat down. You felt her leg touch yours as the bench wasn't very big.

"I can't shake the feeling, that you have been avoiding me, my lady. I had rather looked forward to our time together when I had come back. But it seems you haven't." You felt a wave if sadness rush over you. You had never wanted to hurt Brienne. But you could endure it, spending time with her.

You couldn't say anything, your mouth opened a few times but no words came out. For Brienne that was a clear answer.

"I thought so. I understand if you don't want to spend time with me. I had always feared that one day you would see me for what I really am. That you would see me the way the rest sees me. I assume you are just too polite to tell me. But I think this is answer enough. Still I want to say, I enjoyed the time we had together and if you ever change your mind, I will be there." She wanted to stand up and leave. You panicked, you still hadn't said a word, but you didn't want her to leave thinking what she just said was the truth. You grabbed her wrist and pulled her back. She turned her head, and you hoped she knew you well enough to understand the look in your eyes. She did. She sat down again.

Still holding her wrist you saw tears fall down on your skirt and looking at Brienne's dry face, you realised they were yours. Brienne saw them too. She pulled you into her side and let you cry, not questioning you, not judging you.

Ad you felt your tears dry you pulled back and turned around, so you could look her in the eyes.

"Please, Brienne never think that what you said is true. That's not the reason I'm avoiding you." She smiled at you relief washing over her face.

"But, what's the reason then? Please tell me, my lady. You can talk to me." You knew that. In fact, you had always talked to her, when you had problems. For the last years she had always been there, and you felt a whole in your life where she used to be. You needed her. And in that moment you decided that even if it hurts you, you need to be with her. You would be strong. Because not having her at all was just worse.

"I don't know how to tell you. I really wanted to be happy for you. It's hard, I can't bear seeing you together. But I will learn to, I will be strong for the both of us. Because I need you in my life. Even if it's just as a friend." With that you looked at her and all you saw was... confusion. Pure and utter confusion.

"I'm sorry, my lady. But I really don't understand what you are talking about."

"I'm talking about you and Jamie. And that I love you. I have loved you since I first laid my eyes on you and not being able to ever have you breaks my heart. But it's okay, if you're happy. Which it seems you are." At that Brienne laughed. She really laughed, how could she. What you had just told her wasn't funny. Still she laughed, a real and deep laugh. A relieved laugh. She had really been concerned and was happy that the "problem" was something so stupid.

"Oh, (Y/n), love. Jamie and I are not involved. Absolutely not. He's just following me around like a chicken. It's quite annoying actually. I can't believe you thought that. I was desperately trying to leave him and spend my time with you. But you avoided me, so I was stuck with him." Your eyes widened.

"But everyone was talking about you two. I- even my mother."

"Since when is the castle-gossip something you believe in?" She was right. You had always been the one to not believe it and to question every rumour you heard.

"I'm so stupid. Honestly I can't believe myself." You laughed, happy for the first time in weeks. But as you looked at Brienne you saw concern, no insecurity? You stopped laughing.

"What's wrong?" You took her hands in your and gently stroked over the back of them up to her pulse point.

"Did you mean it? What you said, that you love me?"

You warmly smiled at her.

"Of course I did, what do you think why I was so upset about you and Jamie. I was jealous and scared that I'd lose you.

"You will never lose me. For I love you too, (Y/n) (y/l/n)." You smiled at her and cupped her face in your hands. She blushed under your touch but still leaned down to catch your lips in a kiss.

It was gentle and careful and first. You assumed it was not just your first but also her first kiss. But that carefulness was overcome fast, when she grabbed your hips and pulled you onto her lap. You threw your legs around her and your hands travelled to her neck and up into her hair. She pulled you even closer at that and let out a slight moan. You thought it was cute, but she stopped in her tracks and blushed. She hid her red face in the crook of your neck out of embarrassment as you laughed at her shyness and stroked over her hair. Everything was alright now. You were happy again.

[sungbeam]

BIRD HUNT — teaser

nonidol!choi line x f!reader

gotham city is a gutter running rampant with the ill, corrupt, and the insane. at times, justice and vengeance must be served by one's own hand... no matter the lengths one must go to do so.

▷ genre, teaser warnings. bat family au, vigilantes au, murder mystery au, action, suspense, humor, swearing, mentions of dead bodies, murder, grief, corruption

▷ taglist. open

▷ first ep drop. feb 2nd?, pst (or earlier if i somehow get more writing done)

series masterlist

TEASER BELOW THE CUT (APPROX. 800 WORDS)

"How do you know Ln Yn?"

Beomgyu whirled around just as Soobin settled into the desk chair, waiting. Beomgyu made a scoffing noise, eyebrows flying up to his shaggy bangs. "Where did that come from?"

Soobin shrugged. "You tell me." He slurped up a bit more milk from his cereal before adding, "You're the one who reacted like that in front of everyone when she said she was grieving her mother's death. You sounded shocked that she died."

"Well yeah, wouldn't you be shocked to hear someone else died within the past three days?"

"Stop trying to bullshit him, Gyu."

Both the brothers looked up at the voice who had just entered the underground space. Yeonjun strolled into the main area in a white tank top and sweats, hair sticking up in different places. He stretched his arms above his head and yawned loud and wide.

Soobin cocked a brow at him. "Nice of you to finally join us, hyung. How'd the 'date' go?"

"Great," Yeonjun quipped. "We're going on a second one soon. I think Felix almost sent me off with a kiss goodnight." He slumped onto the edge of the desk, eyes lazily taking in the images and information displayed on the many monitor screens. "This is our stiff, huh?"

Soobin sent him a look that distinctly read 'No, we're just looking at dead bodies for fun.'

"Yeah," Beomgyu replied. "The note the killer left is so familiar to me though. Have you seen it before?" He knocked his knuckles against the monitor with the note.

Yeonjun's eyes narrowed on the screen, before he leaned back with that bored look renewed on his face. "You're both idiots. It's from that one killing a couple weeks ago."

Beomgyu and Soobin traded looks. "What?"

Their eldest brother leaned down to reach the lowest drawer at the desk. From its depths, he fished out a large bag of chips and grabbed a handful to stuff his face with. "Y'know," he garbled and gestured vaguely with his crumb-dusted fingers. "Beomgyu, you know! You were there with me. It was that one lawyer guy who was found dead in his car beneath the bridge. That same note was taped to his windshield."

"Oh yeah," Beomgyu drawled, while Soobin shook his head with a sigh. The former then knocked his foot against the latter's shin. "Aye! You didn't even know it."

"Yeah, because I wasn't on that case," Soobin fired back. He finished off the rest of his bowl of cereal and set the empty ceramic in his lap before crossing his arms over his chest. His eyes, like his brothers', were lined beneath with heavy eye bags. Someone was supposed to be on patrol around the city right now, but neither of the three brothers were in any rush to get up. "So it's just one person going after these people then."

Yeonjun chewed his bottom lip. "Then we just gotta find the connection."

"Was the lawyer guy from a couple weeks ago Lee Sungjae's attorney?" Soobin asked.

Beomgyu grabbed a hold of the wireless keyboard on the desk and braced it upon his thighs. He pulled up an internet browser and typed in their inquiry. All three brothers made noises of disgruntlement; if the lawyer hadn't been Sungjae's attorney, then how were they connected? It was no secret that 99.9 percent of the population here in Gotham had some sort of shadow looming over their shoulder. It was almost impossible to get anywhere without the help of a corrupt figure, whether that be a mob boss like the Penguin or a loan shark with special strategies to get someone to pay up.

Either way, there would be lots of digging required.

"Let's start with Lee Sungjae and the lawyer's records,'' Soobin decided as he sat up in the chair. "We'll sort through phone records, acquire security footage of their movements, their texts, etcetera."

"I call none of those," Yeonjun said. When his younger brothers scowled at him, he raised both hands in feigned surrender with a giggle. "Fine, fine. You're both lookin' at me like I murdered your favorite puppy."

They remained silent.

"What, too soon?"

The basement headquarters suddenly erupted in a dull siren sound, and Beomgyu was swift to pull up a set of footage on one of the monitors. It displayed a section of the sky, a white spotlight circle cast against a massive, dark gray cumulus cloud with a distinct bat shape in the center—their call to action.

All three men were on their feet in an instant—keyboard and cereal bowl abandoned on the table, capes and utility belts clicked into place.

"Meet you losers there!" Yeonjun hollered as the cave filled with the revving roar of his motorcycle engine like a clap of thunder.

Soobin and Beomgyu hurried over to their respective cycles. "Hey, we're not done talking about Yn!" Soobin called to his younger brother.

Beomgyu flashed him a thin smile. "That's what you think!" And he sped away down the runway.

Soobin chuckled to himself, grinning. Then he revved his engine and launched himself after his brothers.

permanent taglist: @flwoie @vatterie @seomisaho @hqrana @ja4hyvn @outrologist @meosjinnn @hyunjaespresent-deobi @stayarmytinyzenmoa-l @gyulfriend @polarisjisung @jaehunnyy @shakalakaboomboo @soonyoungblr @loveliestfelix @zhaixiaowen @justanotherkpopstanlol @w3bqrl @kangfication @fluorescentloves @haechansbbg @super-btstrash-posts @http-gyu @mvvnsseul @mars101 @rikizm

series taglist: @winterchimez @mosviqu @boba-beom @strawbrinkofdeath @baek-at-it-again95 @todosmash

[tellthemeerkatsitsfine]

Pierre Novellie's 2022 stand-up show, Why Can't I Just Enjoy Things, has just appeared on YouTube for free, which is awesome. This show was what inspired his book of the same name, also recently released. Basically the events described at the end of this show inspired him to write a book, and now he's released the book and a video of the show at the same time.

I heard this show about a year and a half ago and enjoyed it, and then heard his 2023 show, Why Are You Laughing?, and thought that was amazing, a step above the decently high bar set by his previous stuff that I knew of (Why Can't I Just Enjoy Things and Quiet Ones, also on YouTube), which means I pretty much forgot about this previous one. But I watched this video this afternoon and was reminded that this show was also very entertaining. I think he was first introduced to me as an observational comedian for people who aren't into observational comedy, which is pretty accurate. A lot of his topics are well-trodden ground for stand-up (though not all his topics are), but he does them really well. I highly recommend this video if you want to hear a man observe how irritating it is when people do life wrong.

I had no idea he was releasing a film of this show, so it was a nice surprise when that appeared on YouTube this week. We've had a few announcements of upcoming ones recently, though. There's a release date for John Kearns' The Varnishing Days, his 2023 show and somehow his first filmed stand-up special (though he did release that one show on vinyl that was lovely). I think it's a parenthood show and those don't tend to be my thing, but I make exceptions for very very good ones, and this one is supposed to be very very good, so I'm looking forward to its release. August 31, apparently.

They've also just announced that on September 10, Ahir Shah's Ends is coming to Netflix. Fair warning to everyone who follows me on Tumblr, that is going to be a big one where I will not rest until I've made everyone I've ever met watch it. That show was absolutely brilliant.

I'm currently doing my Edinburgh Fringe Festival 2024 comedy admin, and having a fantastic time, as I put together a spreadsheet with all the shows I've seen so far. Will of course add more as I get them in from NextUp and anywhere else. I'm formatting my spreadsheet the same way I formatted the spreadsheet I did for the 2023 Edinburgh Festival, with the date and comedian and venue and show title and rating out of 10, but actually out of 40 because I include half points and quarter points, so I can sort them by that and see my favourites. I ended up with 40 shows on my Edinburgh 2023 spreadsheet, and of all those, Pierre Novellie's Why Are You Laughing? came in second as the only 9.5, and Ahir Shah's was the only 9.75. I made those rankings shortly before the award winners were announced, and was reading people on message boards talking about what will likely win the best show award and they were debating about all these shows that I either hadn't heard or hadn't found all that impressive, and I kept wondering if I had somehow misunderstood all of comedy for the fact that my pick for the best show I'd heard wasn't even getting mentioned by the people speculating (same with my pick for second-best, I do think it was an oversight that Pierre Novellie didn't get nominated for those awards last year), but then they announced the awards and Ahir Shah won and I cheered like my favourite sports team had just won the championship. I knew it! I knew that I'd ranked them correctly! I was right and the awards confirmed it! Obviously if a show that I'd seen and thought was shit had won, I'd have said that awards are the bullshit idea that a few people's opinions of a subjective medium count for anything, and they shouldn't exist.

Anyway, I needed to do a brief detour in this post to say "just so everyone knows, I called something correctly once", because I really like being right and think people show know when it happens, but the main point there isn't that I was right, it's that Ahir Shah's Ends won Champion of Edinburgh last year and entirely deserved it, it was brilliant. It's rare that a show can make me laugh that hard, that consistently, and also make me cry by the end. Usually you get emotional shows that are pretty funny or very funny shows that focus entirely on that. Ahir Shah had it nailed across the board. I am so pleased that I will soon be able to force everyone I know to watch it. And good for him, getting as big a platform as Netflix. Those awards are supposed to translate into further career success, aren't they? Sam Campbell won it, and the next year, he got a Taskmaster spot. Ahir Shah won it and the next year he got a Netflix special (and a Bugle debut, very important), which is awesome, but it would be great if we could tack a Taskmaster spot onto that soon, as well.

And in even more stand-up special release date news, this week we finally got an email from John Robins' mailing list that lets us know Howl will be out on audio on September 6. He said in January that it would be out around March or April, but realistically, September was always more likely. I can't blame him. I respect that he's going to the DIY route on stand-up releasing, editing the thing himself and sticking it on Bandcamp. Doing that with this show, given its topic, has to be emotionally difficult to listen to it over and over, as well as taking time and normal editing efforts, so I'm just glad he's releasing it at all, as part of me had a feeling he'd back out of that. I'm looking forward to hearing this one a lot, obviously.

We also got an email this week from Grace Petrie's mailing list, and I was disappointed that it didn't contain updates about the second filming of Butch Ado About Nothing, which I'd thought was happening this summer and supposed to appear on NextUp (on the subject of stand-up shows that have made me cry - I swear it doesn't happen all that often, I think Grace Petrie and Ahir Shah are the only two who did it in 2023). Hopefully that's still happening. It did mention coming to Canada, though. Only Western Canada, but it mentioned the possibility of further dates, so I'll keep an eye on that, in case she moves more central. (Though any Tumblr people in Western Canada, and I know there's at least one of you - I cannot recommend enough going to see Grace Petrie live, I got to last year and it was amazing.)

All this has also reminded me that I read months ago that Marjolein Robertson was filming her 2023 show Marj. I got to see her follow-up, O, in Edinburgh last week, absolutely loved it, which inspired me to look up whether the video of Marj ever appeared anywhere, and it seems like it hasn't yet. There's another thing to watch.

Okay, I think those are the major updates in terms of new recorded stand-up hours that I'm looking out for right now. Everyone watch that Pierre Novellie video, it'll be a good time.

[lerry-hazel]

The long-ass Thomas Barrow post that needs to stop living in my brain

Part 2: The Sad Ones

Be as it may, if the bad stuff was all we ever got to know about Thomas Barrow, eventually I would have accepted, that, nope, he's just evil, – and moved on.

However, the show also has those parts strategically blended in where we are supposed to feel for Thomas. Probably. Maybe. I guess. Right?

First, chronologically, we have the “blighty”: it was possibly meant as a squarely bad thing, in contrast with William, but I firmly believe no one who hasn't actually been to war gets to judge. Nevertheless, I admit it would have gone down better if we could have seen Thomas actually helping the wounded in the hospital, thus still pulling his weight and dealing with the horrors of war, albeit second-handedly.

*******************************************************************

Then comes the Jimmy thing.

A lot could be said about how, if it was meant to be “just a kiss”, it should have been written as just a kiss. But whatever, I remember vehemently insisting – when my outraged grandmother demanded how I could possibly like Judas in JCS – that it's possible to feel sorry for someone just because they are feeling bad, regardless of what they had done to deserve it. From that point of view, Thomas’ willingness to just take it lying down is sort of endearing – at least until you realize he didn't have to, like, hunt down a kangaroo to make the whole debacle go away: all it took – literally – was saying three words. Were it mentioned that at that point no one would believe Thomas over O'Brien, or were the insistence to have Thomas punished presented as Jimmy being done with O'Brien's fake placating and finally pushing back, it would have made way more sense. Of course, Thomas’ subsequent lack or gratitude to those who stood by him at those troubling times doesn't help either.

********************************************************************

Then there is “the treatment”, which surely seems appalling, as long as we assume it's chemical castration, or something equally horrifying that's making Thomas feel so ill. But, as soon as we find out what's actually happening – 

First, even though Thomas’ on-screen medical career primarily consisted of sitting on his arse looking self-important, it's hard to believe he doesn't know what an abscess is. And an abscess is by no means indicative of what kind of treatment he's been undergoing. In fact, Thomas should have assumed he hadn't sterilized the needle properly, and taken himself to hospital as soon as the pain became too much, blaming a rusty nail. Alternatively, he could have tried lancing the thing himself, realizing he couldn't see what he was doing and needed someone to hold a mirror. Or he could have put it off until he couldn’t stand upright anymore. But the way he actually brings Baxter in – to, what, tell him he needs to see a doctor if he's feeling unwell? – looks exceedingly less like he's learned to ask for help, and more like he is unsubtly manipulating her into showing him kindness: right after being pointlessly evil to her – again. Sort of "hate me all you want, I know you'll come running if I call."

And let’s not forget about egging the police on in the first place: mistakingly believing changing this one aspect of your personality will make your whole life better is one thing; literally going through considerable pain to turn your life around, yet still purposely doing things you know are wrong is another.

********Er, triggering content ahead? *****************

In a way, the same could be said about Thomas' suicide attempt.

I'm not making a list of most efficient ways to end one's life, but locking oneself in a bathroom in broad daylight wouldn't be anywhere near the top. Also, not undressing fully kinda suggests he didn’t want to be found naked; yet, were he thinking of those who would have to deal with the aftermath, he wouldn't have left them a bloody bathtub to scrub in the first place. Combined with the cryptic message to Molesley, of all people, it frankly looks less like an act of utter desperation, and more like a pity party.

Like, on the one hand, Thomas does seem to have enough reasons to hate his life. However, while finding love might be indeed tragically beyond his reach, it's kinda hard to disregard the fact that his looming unemployment doesn't come from lack of offering, but from his unwillingness to do too much work. Or that, instead of trying to reconnect with his colleagues by making amends for his past misdeeds, Thomas’ attempts to curb his loneliness come in the form of forcing his presence upon people who have no reason to welcome it (it so pisses me off when in fanfiction Carson and/or Mrs. Hughes are made to apologize for not letting him third-wheel on what was obviously their couple’s time).

If I could find motivation to rewrite this arc, I would probably rearrange it all together. Like, when Thomas is urged to seek employment elsewhere, he grabs the first offer that comes his way, because “he never wanted to stay in Downton anyway”. Then, finding himself in a house with virtually no other servants to rely on, or even talk to, and “upstairs lot” unwilling to put up with his shenanigans, he is starting to realise what a mistake he’s made, and is eventually driven to despair.

Wouldn’t be easy to bring him back, but in DA universe screenwriting miracles so do happen ;-)  

[darkpoisonouslove]

1, 8, 19, 22?

Thanks! I'm just worried about this because I'm so rusty when it comes to the OUAT fandom but let's see.

1. the character everyone gets wrong

You know what? I'm gonna come out and say it - Facilier. The sheer amount of people I saw hemming and hawing about whether or not he was good for Regina because "he's a villain" and "has some hidden agenda" is absolutely appalling. Like, wtf do you mean is he good for her? He's literally the best! He is the only person on the show that's consistently put Regina over himself and his own wants. Like, I know he didn't have a lot of time to mess up but honestly, I don't think that even the writers understood him. He was giving off such strong Rumplestiltskin 2.0 vibes, which is the reason why I think the fandom had this reaction to him, and the writers really kind of went that way when he was even killed by Wish Rumple for wanting the dagger. It was a total waste of a perfectly good, intriguing character, not to mention husband material. Facilier deserved better treatment by everyone. Shadow Queen also deserved better!

8. common fandom opinion that everyone is wrong about

Oh, god, I have no idea what's common.

Oh... Oh, fuck, now I wish I hadn't thought about this but...

People hating on season 7, usually without even having seen it. I think season 7 is my favorite season. There were plot lines that were unnecessary or got derailed or just didn't go anywhere but there was so much fresh stuff in there as well.

Usually, people don't even want to give it a chance because most of the og cast isn't even in there and I understand that because I hate big changes in my shows as well but the truth is that the writers had no idea what to do with the og cast since around the end of season 3 and they were clearly unwilling to spin a different angle to these characters and they were bringing in a new set of characters every half season. It only made sense to get more new characters and let them stay for a longer time.

Really, Henry, Ella and Lucy are precious, Wish Killian and Alice are one of the best parent-child relationships on the show, Alice and Robin are perfect and I think that Lady Tremaine and Gothel are some of the most ruthless villains of the show. There's a lot of raw emotion and fun twists and even if it doesn't end up being people's favorite, I think they should at least give it a chance.

19. you're mad/ashamed/horrified you actually kind of like...

I'm kinda mad that I was into the Cruella x Isaac clusterfuck of a relationship (if it can even be called that). On the one hand, they are not compatible at all. But on the other hand, he is so much of a slimy worm that he somehow manages to match her in horribleness and villainy; he's just on the other side of the spectrum, the pathetic wet cat side. There were clearly feelings. Extremely fucked up feelings. It really is like you're preparing to watch a car crash in slow motion but then you end up being ran over by the car instead, which is a perfect description for them. And that leads me to the fact, that her signature car was actually his first? Oh... oh, I hate the writers for this. Now I'm sold and there's no getting out.

22. your favorite part of canon that everyone else ignores

I guess the tension between Regina x Rumple. Now this is kind of the opposite of question #8 in that the majority of the fandom is correct that s6 Golden Queen was a mistake and, frankly, kind of disgusting and I am saying this as someone whose first ship from the show was Golden Queen. Season 6 absolutely ruined everything that I enjoyed about the ship in favor of what? Them having sex? With zero of the actual appeal of their relationship being involved? And they still could have done something good with that! The fact is that Rumple was treating the queen like a puppet for his plans and that's exactly what she was! That's why he created her. But they should have added more about her being more of a mirror reflection of his. I don't want to write a whole analysis of their dynamic here because I was actually saving that for a meta post (as soon as I find the time to work on it) but the truth is that Regina learned all of her weapons, all of her villainy from him. Even her mannerisms. And now that the little remaining good inside her is gone and there's no conscience to hold her back, she could be even more like Rumple. But at the same time, she's a broken reflection of the situation with Baelfire, who was trying to help Rumple only to be abandoned. And Regina discarded the Evil Queen like trash. Also, another good angle here because Regina practically decided that everything she learned from Rumple was useless. They could have shown him be at least a little attached to the queen on merit of that.

But the thing is that the tension between Rumple and Regina comes from her good parts, the ones that remained with Regina after the split. And that tension has been there all along. He had to take every last thing from her in order to force her to cast the Curse, no matter how bitter and evil he'd managed to make her over the years. He had to crush her hope completely until the only thing that could rekindle it was casting the Curse. Which is the exact same situation that he's in - the Curse is his only hope to find his son. And even after that, Regina is still doing better than he is! And he knows that! The best example of that is his line in 2x09 when he says "One day maybe they'll even invite you to dinner". Because she did what he couldn't - put her own feelings aside to do what is best for her child. There is a tiny bit of goodness inside her persisting no matter what he's doing and that is driving him insane because it is a constant source of problems for him. It took him years - decades - to make her cast the Curse, her trust in Henry really slapped him in the face with his failures where his own son was concerned, her interference in getting revenge on Zelena for killing his son, her sacrifice for Henry undoing his happy ending in 4x22, her splitting herself eventually leading to even more issues between him and Belle. And on the other hand, Regina's attachment to him has gotten her in so many problems but, ultimately, his mistakes and schemes are what got her Henry - the biggest happiness in her life (and he almost killed Henry several times but that's the point exactly). Still, after all of that, they both gravitate towards each other and there's this kind of understanding between them because in certain ways they're similar, but there's also resentment because of the ways in which they're different. It makes for an extremely compelling dynamic and people are so quick to brush it off.

make me choose violence with these asks

[nightfall-1409]

Hiya. You've probably seen me often in the comments for (Re)convene on AO3. Well, I love that story so much that I had to take this opportunity to continue our dialogue in a more appropriate location/setting. Anyway, the reason I reached out, mainly, is that I have a few questions, if you're willing to answer them. Just out of curiosity, what made you decide to make Myles a Wren? And, if it's not considered spoilers, could you explain the overall history of Clan Wren in this universe? Thanks.

Hi!!! I do hahaha

This is a totally fine place to reach out :) (I'm working on the next chapter, but, well, I get distracted easily hahaha) I'm also working on a one shot I'm planning for mother's day from Sabine's POV called "So I as my mother before me"

So I actually was thinking about this ! Perhaps a little bit roundabout until we get back to our answer.

The way that the last Clan Wars is described in both RepComm and the Disney Rebels is as an emotionally devastating wound, that tore family from family, friend from friend, sibling from sibling, parent from child. Most Mandalorians we've met have two names, a name they were given, and a family name. In a lot of fan content, those who have been separated from their family take on a new last name, Naa'sade, but that's not anywhere I've read officially. But we have met a few Mandos with no last name. Given the fact that the schism in Legends happened first between the True Mandalorians and Death Watch (where Tor defected from what Jaster was doing), it stands to reason that what happened between Clans started then.

So, IMO, the Mandos without last names are likely those who've cut ties with their family. Symbolically, spurning their family name and setting out on their own. But they're not of no clan, because clan structure is more than family structure. They're still of the clan they were apart of before, they're just contending which branch of that clan will survive, or else joining a new clan (IE, Silas' loyalty in the comic, to Jango would likely mean he's joining Jango's clan/house)

We've got three Mandos without last names to work with then. Silas (who I already had plans for + we've already gotten a canon face for), Montross (who's well, very dead by now), and of course, Myles.

This brings me back to how I plan stuff. I knew early on that I was planning on having Ursa as we see in the fic betray Sabine's trust (and this time, really break it, because while Ursa hadn't had the full picture of what Sabine has gone through, Sabine's been burnt by her mother before. And this time is far worse. Because she thought she would be able to influence Ursa's choices if she told her mother the truth.)

So I did more than a little character analysis of Ursa. She's a protective mother bear, but she at this point is dead loyal to Death Watch, as she would later be loyal. Her willingness to betray her child's friends and teammates to get her child to safety, her frank conversation with Sabine where Ursa tells her that the entire reason why Ursa never reached out to her was because Sabine was safer away from them... that implies a level of control, a level of knowledge of how these things work, a level of trust in Death Watch's leadership structure, that if she reached out she would get what she wanted. Because Sabine had never once betrayed her name, never declared her parents dar'buir. So making sure Sabine gets home safe was important to her, a) and b) thought that working through Death Watch's House channels would work. Given the fact that the clan wars split up house from house, clan from clan as I mentioned...

And then there's the fact she ended up marrying a New Mando... I'm given to believe that there was some disillusionment with Death Watch from before, but not enough to betray it completely. So I'm inclined to believe that something happened to her during the clan wars, but it's a matter of asking, well, what?

In Short then, there's ample room for a tragic backstory for Ursa wherein she, as her daughter, was raised in the midst of a civil war. Where she, as her daughter, lost a sibling to that war, when her sibling refuted their family, and left, and became nameless. She snaps at Ezra when he says that they're all True Mandalorians, to tell him not to speak on what he doesn't know, meaning, IMO, this sibling could have gone to that side of the battle.

Ursa, Sabine, Tristen, all have latin ties wrt their names, and so does Myles.

So I came at it like that. I wanted to have a sort of pattern, within the Wrens, with Sabine, and Ursa. And further, more than that.... it's useful for other story purposes, as a plot device if Sabine's got a lot in common with someone in PARTICULAR Jango Failed... Wellllll that is a rather juicy potential point of Pain. A good plot point that could come around, as well as being a good theme of the story, of being that of cycles and family dynamics coming around and around, and wanting to break out of it.

Hopefully that answers the question!

[pastafossa]

Pasta, thank you. You are a light and I love you. When you posted that callout, I saw a lot of original concepts and ideas (not TRT stuff)) that she stole from me, especially on Wattpad. I contacted her about this, and I think that seeing TWO authors come after her scared her off. I'm telling you so that if you see some characters that were inserted into her fic later, it will be me and not ... her. Now I have my stuff back! I love you, love you, love you, and I now want to be your best friend.

You're so, so welcome anon, and all my love back! I'm so, so sorry this happened to you, too, I really am. I had this creeping suspicion, especially the more we all dug, that she'd likely stolen from multiple authors. In my experience plagiarists rarely steal from one person, and they're almost always Frankenstein-ing it up and cobbling together a bunch of different stolen sections from all over. I messaged a bunch of the fic writers who I'd seen her mention (or they mentioned/reblogged the post before I got to them, so I knew they'd seen it), but I hadn't managed to find anyone else she'd stolen from, so I just focused on getting all of it taken down, wattpad included, in hopes that whatever other content she'd stolen from other people would go down with mine.

I definitely agree that having more than one author spot it just confirmed for her just how badly she'd been caught - she had people all through her asks and posts, her AO3 comment section filled up before she took it down, and I know some friends went after her on twitter, too. That might have been her oh shit moment, the idea that this could easily become not just my readers but yours, too, and - quite likely - other authors she might have stolen from if this got any bigger.

Thank you for telling me this too, I'm going to be keeping an eye on the DD ao3 fics in the OC and Reader new fics category when I can, so this is helpful to know when trying to eyeball whether she's stolen something and is back around. And I know how good it feels to get your characters back! It feels RIGHT, like this little piece of you has settled back into place where they belong, and I'm so, so glad you could get that feeling too. Feel free to come hang out and become a tumblr friend, I'm not going anywhere and you all are stuck with me. 😂

[snailsbigrace]

After MARI's Death AUBREY Headcanons

(Discontinued)

A/N: Yet another one from my Wattpad! I had a lot of fun with this one! It's very fun to write for AUBREY! I hope you enjoy!

Warnings: Mental breakdowns, bullying, abuse, mentions of death, other stuff that might bother you!

Word Count: 2.4k

- Ohh! I'm gonna have fun with this one!

- AUBREY was completely taken off guard by MARI's passing, and she was immediately filled with grief.

- It wasn't as bad as what HERO went through but it was still pretty bad. 

- AUBREY had always been close to MARI, she was the only other girl in the group after all. MARI always seemed to know what to do to make AUBREY feel better, she was always there for AUBREY and now she was just gone. Like she never existed.

- It was heartbreaking for the poor girl to think that MARI had taken her own life. MARI had given AUBREY comfort when she needed it but MARI was the one who needed comfort. And AUBREY was too dumb to notice!

- She went through a period of self hatred only about a week or two after MARI had passed. Not only was MARI gone but all her other friends as well. SUNNY stopped showing up to school, along with BASIL.

- She hadn't seen HERO outside at all, and from what she heard he wasn't doing the greatest which she could believe. And she had no clue where KEL was. She was all alone.

- The situation back at her house didn't help. She loved to hangout with her friends because it gave her an excuse to leave her house, the place where her parents were always yelling and screaming at each other. 

- But now she had no reason to leave the house and she just wanted to lay in bed all day, not having the motivation to move or go anywhere. Which forced her to hear the two argue.

- AUBREY's mom didn't really care about MARI's death, telling AUBREY that she would get over it and pull through. AUBREY's dad didn't really care either, but he was a bit more supportive. Trying to give her comforting words and hugs..

- So she only had her dad, and then he left. One day she just woke up and he was gone. Nowhere to be seen. She wanted to ask her mom but she was a mess. Drinking, crying, sobbing, mess. AUBREY could not stay there, she knew that.

- So she left, and headed to the only place she could think of at the time. MARI's grave. Going there she talked to it as if it were MARI, as if MARI could hear her. She prayed that MARI could. She vented for hours to it, just sitting there on the grass. 

- This started something. AUBREY would continue to show up and talk to MARI's grave for years, informing her about what had happened, venting, asking how she was, so on. 

- AUBREY's mom's condition only seemed to get worse, she became more cold then she already was and now she was drunk almost 24/7. AUBREY tried to be there for her, just like MARI was there for AUBREY. But the only thing she got in response was her mom tugging at her hair, pulling her over the ladder that led to the attic which was AUBREY's room. 

- She screamed at AUBREY to go away, to never leave that room again, that she was a failure, nothing. That it was her fault that her father left, that MARI was gone. That her friends would never ever want to talk to her again.

- AUBREY had never been so scared of her mom, she was so scared in fact that she was trembling, she tried to climb up, to escape her mom's words. But since she was shaking she slipped and fell, hitting the back of her head on the floor. 

- Her mom just laughed, calling AUBREY a clutz, saying that she would never achieve anything in life if this was all she was gonna do. If all she was gonna do was fall. 

- AUBREY was crying, everything had been taken away from her just like that. Her friends, her dad, her mom. She scrambled back up the ladder as her mom scolded her for crying, but AUBREY wasn't listening, she just wanted to hide away forever, never ever leave attic again.

- She stayed there the next few days, feeling absolutely nothing. She didn't feel hungry, or like she needed to use the bathroom, or that she was bored, she was completely empty.

- Eventually she forced herself out, to eat and use the bathroom even though she didn't feel like she needed to, to check on her mom. But her mom was completely passed out on the couch. What else did she expect?

- She also noticed a box near the front door, confused she went over and opened the box. Inside she found a whole bunch of MARI's clothes, and there was a note on top.

- The note stated that all the clothes were for AUBREY since SUNNY's mom didn't know what else to do with them.

- She started to head to school more frequently with her new set of clothes, trying to not miss so much. She needed to be smart! But it was lonely without her friends.

- One day, after being insulted by her mom she would cry in the bathroom at school, but was caught off guard by another girl asking what was wrong. The girl's name was KIM. AUBREY had seen her before and had even heard about her, she was a complete troublemaker. No good.

- AUBREY ended up being comforted by KIM, who said that if she ever needed someone to hang with she could hang with her.

- But the next day much to AUBREY's surprise BASIL showed up! Her best friend! He was back!

- She gave him a big ol' hug! Asking him where he had been! She missed him a lot and she was so happy to see him back!

- Something seemed off about him but AUBREY just chalked it up to not being over MARI's death. AUBREY wasn't either if she was being quite honest.

- BASIL still stuck around though! He listened to AUBREY talk almost all day, trying to catch him up with all the things he missed, and even trying to hear about what had happened in his life! He wasn't much for conversation though, he was very quiet. 

- AUBREY knew that BASIL had always been very quiet but she didn't expect him to be this quiet!

- AUBREY invited BASIL to come with her and see if SUNNY was willing to come out for once, and she noticed BASIL's hesitance. It took a little convincing but eventually he agreed. 

- As they walked AUBREY was telling him all about how excited she was for high school! How she'd be the coolest kid there. Finally earning a little giggle from her long time friend. She tried to make more jokes as she could tell he was nervous. She was hoping that the terrible jokes would take his mind off things, but jokes were usually something she left up to KEL.

- AUBREY asked BASIL if he had seen KEL around and he said no, but he was confused on why KEL hadn't come to bother AUBREY. AUBREY shrugged.

- When they arrived at SUNNY's house AUBREY knocked but nobody answered, so she knocked again and the same thing, so she did it once more and still no answer. AUBREY was very disappointed. She was hoping since one of her friends came out the others would too, but apparently not. 

- She also noticed that BASIL seemed a little disappointed as well, but AUBREY quickly tried to make things better by offering to go to the park. BASIL agreed.

- As they sat at the park AUBREY tried to think for something to do, BASIL was to, or that's what he said but it looked like he was off somewhere else in his head. Eventually AUBREY came up with the idea to study at BASIL's house!

- Not only would it allow her to avoid home but she could finally go back to BASIL's house! She found his house very pretty, and since she hadn't been there in awhile she wanted to see if it still was.

- BASIL hesitated again, but once again fell victim to begging. Agreeing that they should study and his place.

- They studied in BASIL's living room, his grandma wasn't home, apparently she was out shopping. But BASIL was just so out of it. He didn't really seem to be able to focus all that well so AUBREY suggested they took a break, which BASIL happily agreed to.

- They headed to BASIL's room to relax and AUBREY spotted his photo album. She asked BASIL if they could look through it and he said that he guessed they could.

- It was emotional for AUBREY to see the memories she once shared with her friends, when they were all happy, when she was happy, when BASIL wasn't so quiet and nervous, when SUNNY was around, when HERO was around, when KEL was around.

- BASIL must've noticed this change in mood and shooed her away from the album, suggesting she take a moment to breathe. He didn't look at her when he said this, only staring at the photo album. AUBREY agreed and left the room.

- She went into the kitchen to see if they had any food, she hardly got to eat anything most days so she hoped she could nab something. She was sure BASIL nor his grandma would mind.

- When she reached in to grab what she thought was appetising she heard sobbing come from BASIL's room. She decided that she could eat later and went to check on BASIL.

- When she opened the door she saw him still on the floor, with a marker in hand. He had scribbled all over the pictures, covering everyone's faces including MARI's. 

- In a panic she yanked the album out of his hands and ran to the bathroom, trying to wash off the marker , while trying to be careful not to ruin the photos anymore then BASIL had already tried to ruin them. 

- AUBREY scrubbed desperately to get the marker off and fortunately it did start to come off the photos without damaging them. She sighed, tears pricking in the corners of her eyes. She could've lost the only pictures of MARI and all of her other friends just like that, she already lost so much, she didn't want to lose that to.

- She heard someone shuffling into the room behind her as she tried to get the rest of the marker off the photos. She already knew who it was and she felt hot anger enter her, never had she ever felt this angry before. Never.

- BASIL tried to offer an apology for his outburst but AUBREY couldn't accept that. How DARE he think he can just try and damage the only thing left of MARI's memory and then apologize. He's crazy! 

- So she yelled, she had never yelled like that before but she yelled and screamed at him. She cried and insulted him, and even felt a strong urge to punch him, but she didn't.

- She couldn't take it anymore. He wasn't the BASIL she knew anymore, he was some crazy asshole who had taken the place of BASIL.

- She dropped the album onto the ground and ran away, she wanted nothing to do with him anymore, nothing!

- As she ran she felt anger, just pure anger leak out of her. She had never been so angry, but she had a right to be angry! She did! She knew she did!

- But what she saw next was only an insult to injury. It was KEL, but he was happy, really fucking happy. He was talking and messing around with some of his friends, his new friends. 

- AUBREY couldn't believe this, not only was he happy even though MARI was gone, he had moved on, and made new friends. He had replaced them. 

- Angry tears just kept pouring out of her, she couldn't deal with him right now, not in this state, so she ran before he could see her. Running all the way back to her happy place, back to MARI's grave.

- When she got there she just collapsed onto the ground, a sobbing, crying mess. She begged for MARI to come back, to tell her what to do, to hug her and tell her everything was going to be okay. That she was going to be okay. But she didn't, because she was gone.

- There was nothing AUBREY could do other than cry, what else was she supposed to do?

- AUBREY heard shuffling and looked up, trying to figure out who, or what had made the noise. KIM was there, just staring at AUBREY.

- This was when AUBREY started to stick around with KIM, KIM was the only one AUBREY even wanted to be around at this point.

- There wasn't a thing AUBREY did without KIM at this point, they started to do everything together! They went on walks, they studied, they played games, they stole, that sort of stuff.

- KIM was the one who dyed AUBREY's hair for her after AUBREY brought up wanting pink hair when she was younger, even stating that she still wanted it dyed.

- KIM eventually ended up introducing AUBREY to The Hooligans, she clicked with them almost right away.

- But they way they acted started to have an influence on AUBREY, making her act similar to them. She became mean, and intolerable, and immature. But still was one of the maturest of the group. 

- She got close with them, telling them about her old friends, SUNNY, HERO, KEL, and BASIL. They started to joke around about KEL and BASIL. The group already not liking those two for one reason or another.

- AUBREY hardly interacted with KEL only passing by him sometimes. But he seemed... Disappointed at her.

- The group of course made fun of KEL when they passed by him, often annoying him, but he stood his ground. He'd get back at them, not at AUBREY directly, but all of them.

- They did the same with BASIL, having rude comments already ready for when they passed by. But they took it a step further with him. Unlike KEL he wouldn't fight back, so they bullied him. Finding his reactions funny. Even AUBREY.

- Though she also brought the group to MARI's grave, introducing them to her. It was probably one of the only times they were respectful of something or someone. They all left flowers that may or may not have been ripped out of planters outside of BASIL's house for MARI.

- KIM ended up staying with AUBREY at MARI's grave a little longer. Reassuring her that MARI would be proud of her. 

- "Do you think she woulda' liked us?"

- "Yeah KIM, I think... I think she would've loved you guys."

Thanks for reading! <3

[lonelier-version-of-you]

Have you read the casualty 2023 whattowatch thing? ive only just found out about it now. it talks about things happening in 2023

I hadn't seen it, no, so thanks for telling me! I struggle keeping up with all the spoilers and whatnot these days.

I love how even the WhatToWatch article writers are begging for Dylan flashbacks now. I remember the TV Times Twitter (I think it was them, maybe it was another TV magazine page) liked one of my tweets a while back about wanting a Dylan flashback episode too. I really hope we're actually getting one - I can but hope, and Jon Sen did do childhood flashbacks for Mick on Eastenders after all.

The Stevie/Marcus stuff and the Rash stuff doesn't really mention anything we didn't know already, so I haven't got a lot to say there. I'm growing increasingly confused by everything with Paige and Rash, though - I honestly thought they'd broken up a while ago??

I don't care about Charlie, nor about Paul, so I have nothing to say on their storylines.

The Jan stuff sounds great, and I'm really glad they're following through on the aftermath of everything that happened in "Thin Green Line". Di Botcher is going to be as brilliant as ever.

There's nothing said about Ethan that we didn't know already. Meh. It sounds like a good exit for him and I feel like George Rainsford will probably come back within a couple of years, a la Michael Stevenson when he left back in 2019.

I guess I'm glad they're still continuing the aftermath of the Ollie stuff for David. I still don't think they should have done that storyline in the first place, though. I just hope David at least gets a good exit from the show. (Also, interesting that there's no mention of Sacha's cameo anywhere in the article.)

I was desperate for Faith not to be involved in Dylan's storyline, so I'm really, really angry that she is. I'm going to be even angrier if they actually try to set them up in a relationship. The only way I'd accept that (and it's not something I want to see, because I don't want Dylan to suffer, but it's the only angle they could take that would make a Faith/Dylan relationship storyline salvageable) is if the show finally acknowledges that Faith is an abuser, and it's a storyline about revictimisation and about Faith preying on Dylan's vulnerabilities to sneak her way into a relationship with him, and we get a whole "Dylan's become his mother" thing and the storyline ends with Dylan breaking free and Faith leaving the show. (Again, I don't want Dylan to be with an abuser, but obviously if they want to pair him with one I'd rather if they did actually call it out as abuse than if they didn't!) I don't think the writers would do that, though.

Also, I thought it had been officially confirmed that Nigel Harman was joining the show, so I was a bit confused to see this article saying it's just a rumour lol.

[thornfield13713]

So, this is neat. I mean, I wasn't expecting the game to begin with my protagonist literally being born, but I can roll with it.

I haven't played many games before that integrate the character creator into gameplay quite like this, so it's interesting - between the mirror thing in Fallout 4 and this, it's quite neat. It also makes me appreciate Lucy's introduction in the series a bit more, as it does read very much like one of these character creation scenes. That's a neat little Easter Egg I hadn't picked up on before.

I will say, that line about my character taking after her dad is very funny, because in this case, I had a bit of a guide for character design? Specifically, this photo, which you can apparently find in New Vegas?

I made an effort to try and make my character look like she could plausibly be this couple's daughter. I mean, I'm not sure how good a job I did, because I am not very good at using the Fallout character creator (Baldur's Gate CC, I love you and miss you so much, baby! Please come back! Even if I do appreciate Fallout 4's body type sliders), but I've made the effort. There doesn't seem to be a 'biracial' option to choose in the character creator? I mean, I haven't played that many games with an explicit ethnicity selector, and I can't help but note that they phased that out for 4, so...that was...odd. Was there a general opinion on this at the time? I mean, I'm not trying to start a fight, and I'm not really qualified to have this debate, but it's not something I've ever seen anywhere else. I am...trying to avoid the brown paper doll pit-trap here, but when a character has a canonical ethnicity indicated by things like biological relatives shown in-game, I tend to try and go along with that. If I'm misstepping, please tell me.

...my dude, she literally just finished being born. I think she's still figuring out what her fingers are for, that being a subject most babies are a little bit unclear on. Sidenote: It was very weird to start the game and suddenly Aslan is talking to me? (Yes, I know Liam Neeson has done a lot of other things, but somehow Aslan is the one I always associate with him). And he is not even trying with the accent, so...okay, guessing he came over the Atlantic or something? People do apparently do that, if Colter the mysteriously-Cockney raider boss is any indication.

Oh- I almost forgot to mention, my protagonist does now have a name: Maris Gibb. Her first name was chosen because I knew this game had a lot of Biblical stuff in it, and it made sense to choose something religious. Saints' names didn't turn anything up, as the only saint for her canonical birthdsay was St Henry, but then a friend suggested 'Maris', as a reference to 'Stella Maris', one of the epithets of the Virgin Mary, meaning 'star of the sea', which also contains a nice nod to the importance of water in this game. 'Gibb' comes from the first known use of a sand filter for water, by a Scotsman named James Gibb in Paisley in 1804, who sold the excess water produced by this method to the public.

Oh, and Maris's mother has just died. So, you know, there's that.

[that-weird-deer-thing]

I don't dream a lot and nornally when i do there always feels like a layer of realism to it. None of the events are outlandlish and none of that sleep paralysis stuff. It just things that could occur in real life.

Thank whoever I don't remember parts of them when I wake up. During collage I lost count of how many times I dreamt of work assigments and tests I had to do, it would always take a minute or 2 to realiae that the deadline was made up. Some of them just felt like normal days at collage, mainly study hall and sometimes I would see people I had spoken to the days prior, even if I hadn't interacted with them in person.

There seems to be at least a few repeat scenarios in the ones I can recall. A popular one is that I'm running. I've ran around my local area, ran to avoid crowds, always from something. I don't think I've ever seen what I was running from in any of my dreams.

There are some exceptions but have the same feel. One, I was helping get a car set up to go somewhere, there were other people but I don't know who. I don't think it was my family, all I knew is that we needed to go asap.

It was dark and kinda in the middle of nowhere - possibly raining? It had that shine in the streetlights but I don't remember hearing or feeling it.

I remember ducking behind the front seats and just staying down there for the rest of the dream.

Another odd variant was where I was in a building (all the others had been outside for the most part). I was in a weird mix between a hostel, an Ikea and a University dorm. It didn't look like anywhere I knew of aside from colours. (maroons, vibrant oranges with light blue accents - the colours of the feature walls in my freshman dorms for some reason, everything else was new.)

I was walking around this building trying to find my room, eventually I went to a door that looks kinda like a fire safety door you see in hospitals ir offices - in fact the whole hallway I was in felt like something from a hospital, or at least a disabled bathroom. There was a window but I didn't see anything of note.

I thought to myself this wasn't my room and the door was locked, so I went back to the common area (the previously mentioned warm coloured room).

There were quite a few other students there, all blurred and out of focus, just doing their thing.

I remember talking to someone, I think they were supposed to my a friend of mine, they had the same hair, but I don't remember seeing their face. It was like they were speaking to me directly, but the pov was from over their shoulder.

Then, I saw a guy through some sheves or room dividers. He didn't exactly look threatening: older guy with white, thinning hair, overweight and wearing a shirt and shorts made form a thinner (maybe a light cotton?) pastel coloured material. He also had a big pair of scissors, not huge but noticeably bigger than anything you'd expect to buy in a craft store or something.

Everyone else in the room ran off, and I started to run though the maze of halls as well. I didn't feel scared or threatened by the man at all, I don't think he chased me either. I just saw him and thought I should run as well. I don't remember much after that.

Another random one I remember, I don't actually know what happened. I just woke up feeling disturbed, like I had experienced something that weighted heavy on my mind. It just felt like a bad omen - although nothing happend.

A recent one I actually thought was a memory at first, but was obviously not the second I put thought into it. I was sitting in my room and I just pulled out one of my teeth, nonchalantly. I remember looking at it thinking "oh shit that shouldn't do that" and just put it back. Problem solved?

You could probably psychoanalyse the shit out of me because of these and there probably is a meaning behind them. (especially with the reoccurring ideas). But I don 't really care to know, and even so it probably would just reaffirm things i know about myself.I can't be asked to look down that rabbit hole, I just felt right writing them down somewhere.

[florainkingdom]

"Yeah, can't say I'm very religious myself to be honest. In the sense I don't go to church. Not that opossum's were welcomed by the church, though that's a whole different story." Poppy was kinda avoiding telling Blaze or anyone really the history of the Gods out of worry it would put her in a bad situation again. "Though at least it sounds like they have good intentions. I guess it also helps I doubt your mom would be very happy if they tried anything or were just a problem." Pretty sure no one would want to make a God mad.

"I will say, I do get it. Hard not to be a bit paranoid about someone from a different world who can negate magic to a degree showing up out of nowhere. Not to mention I kinda gave your guards some flak bout not checking if I was okay, though he didn't seem to mind." Poppy was certainly a tad bit hostile until he apologized to her. "I should really apologize to him about that at some point." The opossum hadn't seen him much, though assumed he must work a lot.

"Though at least they sound cool. Can't say I'd see myself being able to deal with the stuff you do, though I'm a bit pushier when it comes to expressing my opinions." Poppy didn't like beating around the bush, typically just saying what she thinks for the most part. "Well, could leave them a pie to try out. Got a few more in the oven right now." The opossum was actually one her sixth and seventh pie by this point proving she really did go baking crazy if you give her the means. "Well, if we can figure out a way for me to get to my world then I could draw a map of where it is. As good as a one I can make." She wasn't the best at drawing.

"Oh, I ain't going anywhere near the water. I can't swim in the slightest, not to mention I kinda have a fear of large bodies of water in general. Some childhood stuff, ya know?" Poppy wasn't gonna open THAT can of worms anytime soon, though didn't shy away about expressing her fear. "I'm sure your friend is good at what they do, though this opossum ain't going anywhere near the water."

Blaze crossed her arms, as her thoughts drifted to the Politics of the Islands and the constant battle she waged in Court. Of the many conflicts she waged, the Priesthood was a constant thorn she may never truly be rid of. They were the custodians of the Flame, those who swore an oath to protect it above all else. They saw Poppy only as a threat, and couldn't see she was as much a Victim in all this. But she knew the Priests hearts were in the right place, for if the flame were to perish---so to Would Sol.

" A Good Heart can be Blinded by one's boundless faith... the Priests are all good people. But there Faith and Doctrine often cloud there Judgement... I do not fault them for it, I understand how vital there role is... But it can be quite infuriating..."

She sighed softly her eyes distant as clearly this weighed quite heavily on her mind.

" I know this is all quite frustrating... But trust me when i say the Priests Duty is an important one. They are Wise beyond there years, and though they may get caught up in Tradition and a fanatical desire to protect Mother. They always mean well, and are some of the kindest people you will meet here on the islands "

" I'm sure i can retrieve your home, though taking you with me might require some outside assistance. Considering i can not simply use my magic to transport us. As for a Job--- there are many duties at the palace you could apply for. Chef is one of many... i'm sure the Royal Chef is always looking for those of competent skills in the kitchen. "

" The islands are quite extensive... and moving around them isn't going to be easy for you. We typically use teleportation... do to the tides and currents being so dangerous. I know least someone who can get you from place to place though... she is a very---quirky young woman..."

[adatheromcomaddict]

How You Meet the Cullens + Jacob

Hi! I've decided I'm going to put some of my stuff from Wattpad, over here. If you want to see my Wattpad, its the same username as I have here. Anyway, this is how you meet the Cullens, + Jacob. Probably intended for female readers, but it could mostly go either way... I think. And I do have the girls as well in here.

Edward Cullen:

Edward and you met at school. Of course.

"Um, excuse me?" You asked a small girl, with short brown hair.

She turned around, revealing her pale white skin, and beautiful golden eyes.

"How can I help you?" She asked.

"I was wondering where Mr. Molina's classroom is?" You replied.

"Oh, yes. I can show you the way!" She grabbed your hand, and pulled you down the halls. (Wow, this is turning into an Alice preference)

"Thank you!" You said, when you two arrived at the classroom.

She pointed inside the room, towards a beautiful boy, with golden hair, and dark, dark, eyes. He glared at her, with his hand over his mouth. I turned to look at her, and she winked back at him.

"Uh, thank you. Oh, I never got your name." You said.

"Alice. Yours?" She asked, still smiling.

"Y/N."

"Well, Y/N, looks like you'll be sitting next to my brother, Edward, in there." She waved, and skipped away.

I walked inside the class, towards the boy, and sat down. He looked away, took a deep breath, then turned back to me.

"Hi, um, I'm Y/N. You're Edward, right?" I asked.

"Yes. I-I am." He seemed like he was in pain or something.

Weird.

Jacob Black:

I had lived in the outermost part of Forks for as long as I have lived. (Sounds like a wedding vow)

We were right next to the border of La Push. Therefore, I go to the school in the reservation.

(I have absolutely NO clue what the school is like there, so I'm making it up)

But, I didn't really talk to anyone. I had a few friends from down in the more central part of Forks, Bella Swan was one of them. She recently moved here full time. I hadn't seen her since I was little.

There was this one kid named Jacob who I had met a couple of times, mostly when he played with Bella snd I while our parents went fishing or whatever.

But, since Bella was going to school in Forks, I decided I would try and re-connect with this Jacob, to see if I could hang out with him.

So, I asked around one day at school for what classes he was in, and found out that he was in one of my classes. How did I never notice? Oh, just me and my oblivious self. (Sorry, if you're like- not oblivious?)

Well, I found him one day.

"Jacob, right?" I asked him.

"Oh, yes, oh, oh! Y/N! Hi!" He seemed to be a very nice boy.

"Yes, it's me. Um, I haven't talked to you in years, I'm surprised you remember my name." I explained.

"I'm surprised you remembered mine." He laughed.

"So, uh, I"m kind of wondering if you want to like, hang out or something. Anywhere works. I just need some company." (Bella who?)

"Sire! You could come by my house today after school and we can catch up. Do you like cars?" He asked.

"Depends." I laughed in response.

"Well, you can come help me too. I like to re-build them."

"Sounds like a plan."

Emmett Cullen:

(for this one you are a vampire already, and yes I basically stole Rosalie's life. Also, if I get facts wrong, don't come for me, just tell me *kindly* and I will fix it)

I became a vampire in 1920. Two years after my brother Edward, and one year before my mother Esme.

I'd been a vampire for 15 years already. How time flies

One day I was running through the forest when I heard screams coming from a small patch. I sprinted towards the place, and saw a boy, probably 20, getting attacked by a bear. I shoved the bear off of him instantly, and bit into it, getting it's blood.

I remembered that the boy was watching, and was probably shaken up, not to mention, he was most likely dying. I turned back towards him, wiping a small bit of blood off of my lip, and said,

"Hello, I'm Y/N Cullen."

"E-Emmet. How did you do that?" He asked, very weakly.

"I have my ways. What hurts?" I asked.

"Everything." Of course-

"I'll be right back. Don't move." Not that he really could. I sprinted back to my house. I opened the door, and Carlisle, Esme, and Edward turned towards me.

"Y/N? What is it?" Carlisle asked.

"There's a boy, Emmett. He got attacked by a bear. He's very weak. You need to turn him Carlisle."

They all sprinted into the woods, and I led them towards where Emmett lay. He was still there, but weaker.

Jasper Hale:

(you're a vampire)

Jasper became a vampire in 1863. (I think)

He was telling me his story.

I had recently been turned into a vampire by Carlisle, after he rescued me, and I hadn't really met the rest of the family yet. (You can make up why you had to become a vampire)

When Jasper had finished the story, I said, "Wow."

"That's all I could get out. His story was just, wow....

I forgot, Edward could read my mind. I only remembered when he chuckled after I thought that.

I gave him an internal glare.

Bella was sitting in the corner, with him.

"So, Y/N, tell us your full story." Jasper smiled.

(Sorry, his is kind of short..)

Carlisle Cullen:

It was my first day working at the Forks Hospital and I needed some directions.

I walked up to mid-height man, with blonde hair, and very pale skin.

"Hello, sir?" I asked him, and he spun around.

"Yes, Ms. Y/L/N?" He asked.

"H-how do you know my last name?" I asked in response.

"I heard someone talking about you coming, and you're the only new face around here. We don't get them often." He smiled, and my heart fluttered. Good thing he wasn't like a super-hearer or anything. {;)}

"Well, uhm, I was just wondering where the surgical ward is?" He pointed towards the left, and I smiled slightly, walking away, and quietly looking back at him after I was sure he couldn't see me.

Alice Cullen:

(You had already seen Alice before, but never interacted with her much, like most of the students)

I was walking around in the forest, when I heard footsteps.

"Hello?" I called out.

"Y/N!" A girl replied, I noticed it was Alice Cullen.

"Oh, hello, Alice." I was a bit confused to how she knew my name, but to be honest, I knew her's too and that's a bit strange. But, everyone does talk about the Cullens.

"What are you doing out here in the forest?" She asked me. I didn't have a valid answer. I could say "Just felt like taking a stroll..." or "Oh, I'm working on my steps." but, none of those were true, I really didn't know what I was doing here.

"Uhm, working on my steps, and taking a stroll....??" I questioned myself.

"Oookay then. Would you like to come with me? I can show you some of my favorite spots to relax." The way she said relax made me think she wasn't relaxing, and probably meant running around and exercising. Just what I needed.

"Sure, sounds great." I smiled.

Rosalie Hale:

Everyone that lives in Forks knows about the Cullens. Even the people in the reservation.

There's the three boys, the goofy one, the silent one, and the constipated one.

Then there's the two girls. Alice and Rosalie.

I've talked to Alice, we've said hi.

But in general, I know nothing about Rosalie.

All I know is she is incredibly smart, beautiful, and did I mention gorgeous?

I've never had the guts to talk to her. Maybe it's that I'm a wimp, or maybe it's that she is very intimidating. Probably a mixture of both.

But today, I got lucky, and didn't have to talk to her. She talked to me.

I had noticed her eyeing me a few times, and I never knew if she was looking down on me, in a bad way, or if she was interested in me. Both ways scared me.

Today, she came up to me.

I was sitting at the lunch table with Angela and Jessica, and the new kid, Bella.

"Y/N, can I talk to you really quick?" She asked.

"Uh, uh, yes, yes, sure." I stood up quickly, and while walking away with her, I turned towards Angela and Jess, and they smiled and winked.

"So, what did you want to talk about?" I asked.

"Well, I wanted to know... did you want to hang out sometime?"

"Like, a date...?"

"Uh, yeah. Like a date." She smiled and we both laughed.

"Sure." I smiled back.

Bella Swan:

Apparently, today Chief Swan's daughter is moving to the school.

I'm looking forward to it, I want to make more friends.

I was standing outside, waiting to see if I spotted her, when a big, orange-red truck pulled into the parking lot.

It must be her! I've never seen that truck before.

I ran up to it, when I saw people laughing at it. Whatever, I think it's cool.

She climbed out of her truck, and I probably startled her, standing there.

"Hi! I'm Y/N Y/L/N. You're Chief Swan's daughter, right?" I asked.

"Uh, yes. Bella Swan." She stuck out her hand, and I shook it.

"So, do you want to know anything, anything special?" I asked.

"Um, I'm not sure...." She said, tucking her hair behind her ear. (Ugh, a classic Bella move)

"No worries. Let me show you to your first class." I smiled, and took her hand, pulling her down the hallway.

Esme Cullen:

I was walking around town, alone. A kind of dangerous move, since there have been so many mysterious attacks lately.

I was looking through random stores, when I noticed Esme Platt, (we're just saying she isn't a Cullen because I guess they aren't married...????) Carlisle Cullen's old friend. (I don't even know how to write this...)

"Hi, Esme." I said.

"Oh, hello, Y/N." She smiled.

"How have you been?" I haven't seen her in a while. We've talked a few times.

"I've been good, how have you been?" She replied.

"I'm great. We really should catch up sometime." I said, trying to be subtle.

"Yes, we should. Do you want to go to lunch tomorrow?" She asked.

"Of course! Where do you want to go?"

"Don't worry about me. I won't eat much anyway."

******

So, yeah, that's it. I'm aware that these aren't perfection, bur they were fun to write so, yeah!

I will be posting a lot more now since I'm getting really into writing again ;)

Thank you all for reading, (not that a ton of people are going to read this lol)

And yeah, see you soon! :3

-Ada

[f1nalboys]

Could I request hcs for Bo, Vincent, Brahms, and Stu on an s/o with really bad social anxiety? Its ok if you don’t want to, or if you just do a few of those characters :) have a nice day!

thank you for the request!! I hope you had a great day as well :,)

WORD COUNT: 768

WARNINGS: social anxiety/panic attack mention

BO

Bo and Stu are tied for the worst at understanding your anxiety

Bo doesn’t even really notice because people don’t tend to go to Ambrose in big groups

Plus he chalks your avoidance of the victims as you not wanting to get involved which he prefers

He really notices the first time he took you into town and you panicked

He’s never seen a panic attack in person (not including victims because that’s a different kind of panic) and he has 0 idea of how to help

‘The hells wrong with you?’

If you’re panicking in the car, before going in anywhere, he’ll get frustrated with you

Might be an asshole (who am I kidding, he’d definitely be an asshole)

He’d be mad because you all hadn't even gotten out before you started freaking and he’d be extra pissed if you wanted to leave

‘I drove the hour here and you wanna leave? Hell no.’

It’s better to talk to him beforehand about your anxiety so he has ample warning

After you explain it he still won’t really understand but he’ll be more aware and considerate

He’ll let you know if there’s a big group coming through, he’ll let you know if he’s gonna need/wants you to go into town with him, that kind of stuff

He’ll also try and help you calm down if you have a panic attack/you’re really getting anxious but unless you tell him what works for you he’s not gonna be the best at it

He will put in an effort, though

VINCENT

As the polar opposite of his brother, he understands you immediately

He doesn’t have social anxiety himself but he is 100% an introvert and his social battery is very low

Lets you stay in the basement with him if you want though you’d have to be okay with the whole waxing-people-alive thing that goes on

On the very rare occasions he goes into town with you, he doesn’t push you to do anything you’re uncomfortable with

He’ll find some secluded places the two of you could be and he’ll learn breathing techniques and other ways to help you

Really sweet, honestly the best one out of the four in my opinion

Will absolutely fist fight Bo if he makes fun of you and he will win!

BRAHMS

Not the worst but not the best

Again, not a lot of people are coming by besides the grocery boy so you won’t really need to worry about it

Now, if you have to go into town, which he hates, that’s when he’ll see how your anxiety affects you

Will question you and try to figure out whats wrong (he will think it’s because you don’t want to leave him lol)

‘So… you’re scared of crowds?’

Like yeah but it’s a little deeper than that lol

He can’t really do much to help when you’re going into town but he’ll make a slight effort to give you encouragement before you leave and after

He’ll spend lots of time with you afterwards, listen to you vent if need be, and be quiet for once

Won't even try to initiate sex!! What a gentleman

Try and teach him some things you’d like for him to do after that would help you feel better but it’s gonna take him some time to actually get it and be able to implement it

STU

The second worst about his, right below Bo

He’s not bad at it in terms of making fun of you but he just does not understand it

Stu is an extroverts worst nightmare! He hates being alone and he finds himself more comfortable in a large crowd

Especially when that crowd is paying attention to him

Which, if you’re out with him, might be awful for you lol

He’ll be hurt if you decline to go out with him because he thinks it’s because of him

Try to explain it to him, he’ll be understanding but he’s in the ‘you have to go out and face your fears!’ mentality which can be good in small doses

He will also make promises to not be as Out There as he normally is but that doesn’t tend to last long with him

He will take the time to learn whatever it is you need him to do to calm you down/make it easier on you so that’s a plus!

Give him time and he’ll get better at being more in tune to how you’re feeling when you guys go out and he’ll even leave a party early if that’s what you need

[ticketstomydaydreams]

HOME

(All We Have: Part One)

Part Two

Colson x Female Reader

Summary: You and Colson are close friends and he invites you to move in to his house while you work on his record together

Word count: 1,580

Feels: Friendship Fluff for now

Warnings: Alcohol consumption, cursing, mentions of feeling depressed

Companion playlist:

Machine Gun Kelly - Home

Sia - Dressed in Black 

The Beatles - With a Little Help from My Friends

A/N: Throughout the series there will be changes to the timing of real life events like the pandemic, the release of certain songs etc. There's certain things I want to incorporate into the series, like particular events in MGKs life and lyrics from songs, so some stuff will get moved around to fit in to the story ✌️

______

It had been a long evening working in Colson’s home studio, The Boulevard, with him and the gang on the upcoming Tickets to my Downfall album. To say your schedule was busy was an understatement, but Colson had insisted you get involved with the new material after the success of your work together on Hotel Diablo.

Composing music was your main gig, you had an ear for melody and your passion for writing meant you always had lyrics swirling around your head. You had a penchant for dark and melancholy lyrics, finding music to be a source of therapy for you. It was something you and Colson had instantly bonded over. He'd bugged you to list some of the stuff you'd written that he'd know and you had gained his professional respect immediately.

He always kept a close eye on your work, ever the supportive friend and had laid claim to your piece ‘Glass House’ as soon as he'd heard it.

______

2019

You were sitting crossed legged on the sofa in your lounge, gently strumming your guitar and gazing off into space and mumbling to yourself, as you worked out some lyrics in your head. Colson was lying on the floor by your feet, scrolling through his phone with earphones in, a blunt in his hand that he occasionally passed up to you. This was a common set up, you found it easier to write in the peace and quiet and Colson has gradually started hanging out at your place more when he needed to focus on his own writing.

"All alone in the glass house, lie awake til the sun's out, pink sky when you come down…"

"Throw me in the damn flames, Bury me in gold chains, throw me in the damn flames…"

You'd started singing out loud, occasionally stopping to scribble down lyrics and make adjustments, not noticing that Colson had removed his earbuds to listen to you

" Dude, that's hard, like, beautiful… " His comment made you jump slightly, you hadn't seen him propping himself up on his elbows, watching you intently "Sing that last bit again"

You blushed slightly, his opinion was always important to you, and started singing. He muttered to himself as you did, then pointed at you "Again!"

Letting out a little laugh and rolling your eyes, you sang again

"Throw me in the damn flames, bury me in gold chains, throw me in the damn flames"

Colson's voice met yours at the end of the line, rapping softly "I'm waiting on the rain to come and wash it all away"

You locked eyes, smiling and he sat upright. "Dude, Im'a need that hook! That spoke to me right there, I've think got something for it that I've been stuck on"

He looked so excited, your heart did a little flip. You'd seen that writing this album had taken it out of him, he'd been digging deep and really going through it emotionally. You could tell it was going to be raw and special from what you'd heard already.

He sat forward and moved the guitar from your lap so he could lean his arms on your knees and looked up at you shooting you puppy dog eyes with those baby blues "Pretty please Y/N"

You laughed and ruffled his hair, "Anything for you Col" Honestly, it'd be an honour to be part of such a personal project, you thought

He wrapped his arms round you and squeezed,

"You're a legend, kid. Get a sample recorded and send it to me!" He grabbed your guitar off the sofa and whipped back around, strumming a few chords as he carried on talking with his back to you, leaning against the sofa "This is gonna be fire, you always just hit the nail on the head, I swear it's like you're in my head sometimes"

You smiled, seeing the wave of motivation that had struck your friend. You felt so lucky to have a friend who was not only so inspiring, but one who 'got it', who understood that music was a form of release. Someone who recognised that it was important to feel these things, rather than encourage you to push dark thoughts away with toxic positivity.

He’d pushed to use your original samples on his record, but as much as you loved writing and singing, you were a behind the scenes kind of gal which had always suited you just fine. Naomi, a mutual friend of you both, came onboard to record them with him. A decision that turned out to be golden… 'Death in my Pocket' would be born not long after, with Naomi doing your lyrics such beautiful justice yet again, perfectly pairing with Colson's emotional rapping.

______

From then on Colson had kept you close to his recording. You'd been helping here and there with composition and notation, but your production skills were what was taking centre stage during the most recent sessions. You had a long list of projects you were working through, leaving you chained to your equipment most days and nights anyway so throwing more music into your workload didn't seem like much of a big deal. In all honesty, the chaos of Colson’s studio and the revolving door of personalities that were in and out constantly, made it one of the most fun places to be. You loved what you did for a living and it never really felt like work Even though the guys were a real handful at times, you kind of enjoyed being the studio 'Mami' as they often affectionately referred to you

Everything had wrapped up for the evening and the guys had migrated back into the house. You could hear from the raucous that the drinks must have started flowing freely. You were saving your work and packing up your stuff when Colson bursts back into the studio and throws himself in a chair, spinning it around with his arms in the air.

"You staying for drinks Y/N?" he grins at you, clearly hyper and in party mode

You let out a big sigh "Urgh, I'd love to but I have an early start tomorrow. I finally managed to get an apartment viewing. I swear I've looked at a hundred places now, they get snapped up so quickly.. I've only got a few weeks left on my lease as well"

“Ah, that sucks kid” Colson empathises, spinning his chair again before an idea strikes him “Wait! Why don’t you move in here for a bit until you find a place? The guest room is pretty much your room anyway, the amount you crash here”

You laugh “This is true, that mattress is so much better than mine! Aw Col, that would honestly be so helpful, the stress of finding a place when I’m this busy is killing me. I don't know… You sure the guys won’t mind?”

Colson scoffs “Why would they mind? You practically live here anyway” he teases “I’m sure they’ll be just as stoked as I am at the thought of you joining the madhouse for a while”

Before you have a chance to respond, he stands up and throws his arms around you, squashing you into him tightly “That’s it decided Roomie. Another song in the bag and a new housemate, plenty to celebrate tonight!”

Wriggling out of his tight grasp, you laugh and in a deep voice shout “let’s goooooo” mocking his signature catchphrase. He flips you his middle finger and says “Kitchen, now”

Once you’re in the kitchen, Colson heads to get you a drink and grabs one himself. Appearing back at your side, he passes you your beer and then shouts out to the rest of the group,

“YO, meet our latest housemate, Y/N is moving in. LET’S FUCKING GOOOOO”

Everyone in the kitchen lets out a big cheer, clearly pleased as he said they would be. Colson bends down and picks you up, swinging you around in a circle, spilling your drinks all over the both of you as you shout his name in mock annoyance, between giggles.

“I hope you know what you’re letting yourself in for” Rook laughs, clinking his drink against your now empty beer bottle once your feet are back on the floor

“It’ll be good to have another pair of hands around here, looking after you lot” Ashleigh chimes in, laughing and slapping Slim away as he pulls her hood up over her head, covering her eyes

It had been 5 years since you'd made the decision to move to LA, barely knowing a soul. You'd worked several jobs, jumped from place to place, worked your ass off to catch your break in the music business, sometimes feeling like the grind would never get you anywhere.

There had been times where you felt like you couldn't carry on, aching from trying to keep pace. The dream had felt like it was turning into a nightmare, as you tried to make ends meet, feeling so lonely in this enormous city.. but eventually you'd made these amazing friends who made you feel so safe and loved.

Now, there were times you had to pinch yourself just to make sure it was all real.

As you shake off some of the beer that's dripping from your hands, you look around the kitchen. Taking in the crazy, loveable bunch before you, your new housemates, you are filled with gratitude. You finally felt like you were exactly where you were supposed to be…

Home.

______

❌❌ Lace up!